thoughtshowerings

As the year draws to a close, swept away by the December cold winds ( fyi, I HATE the weathers now. hate it hate it hate it hate it. bloody cold and turning anaemic from mosquito bites) I start to think about my achievements for this year. And I realized that I am becoming more and more mediocre, its so scary. I ask myself a lot questions, ranging from narcissistic ones to deep, profound ones, questioning my looks, my character as a person, the values I uphold and claim to uphold ( very profoundly different ), my intelligence and my future as a whole. I feel as though my life has sort of plateaued off somewhere. Slowly tarnishing, no longer emitting the shine it used to. Like a tap used for too long, letting calcium build up on the surface. And I tell myself, no, I cannot allow this to carry on, I must strike out as an individual, I simply must not mill around like the other man beside me. I want to do something different, something that distinguishes me from the rest. Wh...

Back from self imposed hiatus. Or rather because I was too lazy. So many things happened in this short period of time. And I leant alot about myself. And of other things. 1) The number of friends you have is really insignificant.yes, granted that it would be useful to have a wide network of people, you never know when you need their help. But I feel that the quality of friends is what is important. Some are ephemeral, temporal; they flitter in and out of your life. Others stay with you till the end, stubbornly at your side no matter what happens. I'm thankful for the stubborn kind who have always been around even when I behave much less than ideally. 2) Sometimes, choices that I make on a whim turns out to be the best choice ever. And choices that I make when I'm informed and very certain turn out to be disappointing. Touch rugby is an example. I signed up because, well, I cannot really remember why I did it on that faithful day, but I'm glad to say that right u...

原来这些百听不厌的歌曲后面隐藏着那么辛酸，那么令人感动的故事。。。虽然考试即将来临但还是希望能和一些人分享分享。歌曲真的能够勾起好多好多回忆。。。 06年10月17日《康熙来了》，我看到小S哭，第一次看她哭的那么伤心，那么难过，连一旁的康永都有点慌，忙给她擦眼泪,其实都是因为吴克群唱到了《我不难过》，歌词是 ­一个叫杨明学的人写的，小S的已故好友，而他现在在天国....一曲落下小S激动落泪，说在杨明学病重的时候很想去外面看看,小S 黑人 范玮琪就推着坐在轮椅上的杨明学去KTV,小S说他是用生命最后的力量去感受人生..... 王菲的《旋木》很好听，很多人很喜欢。大家都觉得这首歌很纯、简单安静、夹着淡淡的忧伤，让人很享受这种感觉。《旋木》MV里除了王菲，还有一对青年情侣，就是《旋木》词 ­作者杨明学和他的女朋友许维恩。 杨明学原本在加拿大念书，2002年因病回台湾就医，从此开始发表他的创作。杨明学以简洁却深刻的文字，传达世间人情，尤其是对感情的深切 ­描绘。杨明学在歌坛的作品不少，包括王菲演唱的《旋木》、孙燕姿的《我不难过》《休止符》、蔡健雅的《失乐园》及B.A.D演唱的《我的错》，歌词都出自杨明学之笔。  这首歌的DEMO叫《恋曲 L.A. 》，是袁惟仁的作品。王菲拿到这首歌的DEMO时表示歌很好、但太甜、不适合自己。后来找杨明学重新填词，王菲才接受了这首歌（其实王菲唱这首歌时，杨明学已经得了绝症） ­。 袁惟仁真的很喜欢这首歌，他不但在《爱原色》这张合辑里发表了《恋曲 L.A.》，后来还把王菲版的《旋木》重唱了一遍。 2003年11月7日，王菲推出了她的国语专辑《将爱》。2003年11月19日，王菲赴台湾宣传《将爱》，上小S的节目《娱乐百分百》。节目最后小S说她要唱《旋木》这 ­首歌，希望死党杨明学能够早点好起来，可以跟她们一起去玩。小S是哽咽的唱这首歌的，唱到最后已经泣不成声了。  没过多久，2004年1月6日，才华洋溢的杨明学，因罕见的泡状软组织肿瘤病逝，年仅24岁。杨明学的过世，让许多他圈内的好友都很心痛；杨明学的追思告别式，他圈内的好 ­友黑人、SOS姊妹、范玮琪、杨乃文、朱孝天都前去送他；和杨明学有深厚交情的歌手Gackt也以感人的追悼文章传达不舍之情；杨明学的女友许维恩网上留言说到：旋木的M ­V是我们永远的...

Today I'm feeling quite like a square peg in a round hole. Sticking sorely out. Unable to fit in. Did I actually allowed myself to become this square peg? I know I'll never become a round peg, given my own personality. Nope, it is not out of self pity, not out of any thing emotionally negative. Just feeling out of place some times. Awkward. General uneasiness. How come my posts are always bordering on depression or treading around edges of self pity?! No. 要振作起来！ 最近天气都还不错，有好蓝好蓝的天空，白白的云朵。 我觉得我可以花一整天仰望天空，看着云朵飘，想些有的没有，也是一种乐趣。 我好像变得越来越内向喔。。。也没什么不好的啊。 看着云朵有看着云朵的乐趣，不是吗？ Lets Go! A few more days till examinations are over. Temporal stop in acquirement of knowledge. awwwwww.sucks.

Counting down to 2012. As of now, there are only 57 days left till 2012. 57- A small number considering the number of days that had already passed. 57- Just under 1 hour, easily spent. A long walk, sauntering in malls, people watching 57- A low score for your exams. 57- Days someone else in the world has left to live 57- Days someone else just got together with their significant half 57- Just the right amount of words to express your feelings concisely. How many 57s have you let slip away from your hand? Guess I'm feeling rather pensive today. Sometimes, I sit on the bus, leaning against the window, thinking really hard and trying to grasp a concept that I find it hard to express it out verbally or string it, using vocabulary into coherent, followable thoughts on paper. I feel that sometimes everything seems... surreal? That's the word everyone uses when they run out of vocabulary to describe a particular abstract feeling. I see the cars zoom past, people car...

Sometimes Good Intentions Are Not Enough. (SGIANE) Recently, there has been a flurry of OCIP activity fund raising in school. Activities range from selling overpriced bubble teas, coerce sales of T-shirts, clean children safe car washes that did not involve any babes to plain donations. Aims of such OCIP are generally vague, with the use of flowery but intangible words like "empowerment" or "as to develop them into productive, responsible, self reliant, competent and compassionate individuals of tomorr ow." Note that this is not geared towards a certain group, but rather at the idea of the OCIP spirit.  As of such, someone please enlighten me, what the whole chunk of words above really and truly mean. It completely sounds like a PR reply when asked what the team's objective was. What's the Problem? 1) The team will only be there for a total of 3 weeks or so. Including time catering for own R&R activities. Doesn't that make it only 2 weeks ...

A flood of misfortunes. I have been plagued with a slew of unfortunate events. One after another. They just keep turning up at my doorstep. I tell myself, bad days are anything but permanent. They are transient, ephemeral. They cant last forever , can they? So I just hang on and tell myself, it'll go away, it'll go away, it'll go away. I think I have sort of mellowed out? I dont get as easily angered as I used to do. I am calmer than usual. Despite the onslaught of assignments. I take things slightly easier. Lament a bit, and get back with life. Or maybe its not that good to be that back? Hmmmmm... I feel like I am losing some connections. Like a rope, losing its fibers one strand at a time. Insignificant individually, but impactful when considered as a whole. University's strange. It feels...highly commercialized. You dont go there to receive an education just because you want to per se, but rather in lieu of the income you will get in the fu...