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Conversion to Introversion 1101E

Mid June : Temperature creeps steadily up
End June : Humidity levels rises around the island, skin feels oddly sticky all the time
Start July : Its starting to burn
Now : Unbelievably, blisteringly hot

Which also signifies one thing - University's finally starting for some of us who have waited for almost 3 years.

That thought alone is, undoubtedly scary.
Almost 3 years of not processing thoughts in a logical, sequential way.
Of not looking at problems in another angle, thinking about possibilities of solving the targeted problem.
Of not feeling the stress of exams.
Of not churning out essays after essays on demand.
Of not practising hand writing.

It also marks a total character change for the some of us.
Like myself.

I suddenly feel less prone to mingle around, the intuition to get to know more people lessens.
There is not a compelling urge to get to understand new people on a deeper, more personal basis within me.

Knowing new people has become sort of a chore for me.
To quote a friend, "its tiring to get people to know me all over again, starting from the very beginning".

Yes, all friends start from completely unrelated strangers from two almost parallel lines.
Its because of a series of events, unrehearsed and un-choreographed that the two lines entwine and mangle up.

So in sort, I conclude that I am becoming an introvert.
And as Wikipedia, my best friend online puts it, "Introversion is the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life.Introverts are people whose energy tends to expand through reflection and dwindle during interaction.Introverts tend to be more reserved and less outspoken in large groups. They often take pleasure in solitary activities such as reading, writing, music, drawing, tinkering, playing video games, watching movies and plays, and using computers, along with some more reserved outdoor activities such as fishing".

Lately, I have been enjoying solitary runs, swims, and going to the gym. Its like stimulating the pleasure center (which, by the way, is not a term I made up) of my brain. I feel contented and happy doing these solitary sports.

Whats happening to me? I dont feel dismayed that I am transforming into someone who's more reserved and inward. Perhaps its a pre-Uni syndrome that I suffer from. Wait till post-Uni withdrawal symptoms kick in.

Or maybe its because of all vast unknowns I am plunging myself into.

Or maybe its that I am really an introvert. An introvert hiding under an extrovert's exterior.
Its just that I never really had a chance to truly discover my inner self. Ok. Now I'm just sounding like one of those crappy shit self-help books that begins with the title "Discovering thyself" or "The journey into oneself" and so on.

I just want to hang out with all my old friends.
They make me so comfortable. And at ease. I can relate to them, talk rubbish.
Look completely unglam, but dont care anyway, they've seen me at my worst. So whats wrong with geeky specs, undone hair and mismatched clothes? Or at least I dont care.

Perhaps this, like I mentioned earlier, is just a phase I'm going through.
Growing up mah, right not? Hopefully it'll be over me real soon.
____________________________________________________________________

On a totally unrelated note, my colleague educated me on a very interesting and bizarre mating habits of the angler fish.

Angler fish as we know ( or maybe you dont, because you spend wayyy too much time playing computer games) lives thousand of feets underwater.

So obviously they are blind. The females have a modified fin that has a glowing bulb, containing bioluminescence bacteria that pulsate or glow attracting unsuspecting prey before devouring them in a flash.

Males on the other hand, are only a fraction of their size. They do not have any modified fins and have underdeveloped digestive systems. Meaning they are not able to feed. They however, do have a highly developed olfactory sense that can sense female angler fish hormones in the vast ocean.

Once they locate her, the males then latch onto her body, using its jaws. It then secretes enzymes that starts to digest itself, lips, jaws, brain, eyes, head etc etc. Until it FUSES partially with the female. The fused male's bloodstream are now one with the female's blood vessels.

All that's left are the male's reproductive organs.
And when the female thinks she's ready to reproduce, she triggers certain hormones and releases sperm cells to fertilize her eggs.

One female may have more than one male "attached" to her.
BIZARRE or what. Dont choose what.

Gives a whole new meaning to the word, "attached" in a relationship.

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